You’d think the world was expanding, instead of shrinking.  Lately I have gotten the worst possible service on overnight deliveries in the past week.  I’m mad and I’m going to name names!

First was the USPS Express Mail package that was needed for the opening of Deanna’s show.  Despite being clearly marked as "Signature Waiver Requested" on the form, the postal worker stuck notices in our mailbox for two days in a row asking us for a signature.  Now, our mailbox is about a mile and a half from our house, and securely locked with a key, so you wouldn’t think signature requirements were common in our neighborhood.  In the end we had to hoof it down to the Post Office to pick up the package ourselves.  And when you ask for a refund, they give you a bunch of forms that have to be filed by the sender (who has no incentive to file them since he already collected the overnight charges from you for the service.)  Shame USPS!

Then I had a financial company send me two important documents.  For some reason, the two documents, issued minutes apart from the same location in New Jersey, were split between DHL and FedEx.  I had issued written instructions to waive the signature requirement, but apparently our neck of the woods is the only one where there still is some trust that packages left by the side of the road will find their intended destination without mishap.  According to the FedEx agent, the FedEx package was marked as requiring a signature.  The first delivery attempt failed because FedEx had lost our gate code and couldn’t reach the house.  But no failure notice was left behind so I didn’t even know about the problem!  The next day also failed but at least they left a notice.  I updated our gate code on file and expect delivery tomorrow (I’ll also leave notes, signatures, alternate recipients, and maybe a banner across the road as backups).  Shame on the sender, and on FedEx!

The DHL package made it safely without requiring a signature, but still took an extra overnight for no apparent reason.  Shame DHL!

I’d like to say use UPS, as I’ve had much better service from them, but I still recall a few years ago when the UPS driver encouraged my neighbor to pass at night in a tight spot and the neighbor rolled off the road, a couple of hundred feet down a ravine, and had to be flown to the emergency room in a helicopter.  A bit of blame to share there, but still - Shame UPS!

I guess that leaves Airborne Express with the cleanest record, yet I haven’t had a delivery sent by them in months.  There clearly is room for improvement in this industry!

Or am I just getting completely spoiled by netflix?